Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This

So, today was one of those days that you know going in, it's going to be hectic at best with the potential of being a waking nightmare. I took my boys to have their pictures taken. Now, this isn't something I've done for a really long time. It's expensive and the shots haven't always been wonderful. But there was a Groupon for $16 for nearly $200 in photographs, so I decided to take a chance. How bad could it be?

The day started out with a plan, but any plans involving a 5 year old, 3 year old and 1 year old are dicey from the start. I laid out the kids' clothes and kept them naked until I was almost ready to go out the door. The Bear, however, found a Father's Day chocolate left abandoned out in the open. No problem, he's naked. Enjoy your chocolate, son. Somehow, though, he managed to get in a wrestling match with his brother, rolled over onto the shirt I had for him and DROOLED chocolate onto the collar. Sigh. So, it IS possible to get your clothes dirty EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT WEARING THEM. So, I had to take a few minutes to rinse the collar out and then dry the shirt with a blow dryer. It looked almost clean.

Once we got to the photography store, they checked us in and took us back. The boys were excited about having their pictures taken, which was hopeful. The photographer was less than thrilled, which is odd since this place shoots almost nothing but children. He placed my kids (manhandled them really) and proceeded to bark at them for the next half hour. Put your hands down. Close your mouth. Stand still. These are legitimate things to say when photographing children (which is probably as difficult as training fleas for the circus) but I wasn't so sure his tone needed to be quite so gruff (the language I used in my head to refer to him was far less G rated). At one point he turned to me and said, "You're kids are really good listeners." Really? Thanks. How about not yelling at them then.

By the 11th pose my 1 year old was all done and announced that any further pictures taken of him would include red eyes and a pouty lip. So we called it day. We waited for 15 minutes while he processed them and I should have known I was pressing my luck. The place was set up for kids to run around a bit, so I let them expend a little energy. By the time the pictures were ready to view they were nearly wild with having been good for far too long. I looked over the pictures, chose the ones I liked best (while trying to manage the quickly disintegrating situation around me: Don't climb on the table. Stop pulling your brother's arm. Stop screaming!!) I picked the best shot of the three boys and a few others (of course we all knew this would happen) and waited for the pictures to print out. She brought them out and I realized to my horror that I'd chosen (for my Groupon package that included 8 color pages) of a shot where my 5 year old had one eye almost closed. Hand to forehead.

I took the boys to Chick Fil A as promised and collapsed in the chair while they inhaled nuggets and fries. It'll be a while, I think, before we try this one again. Unless the Groupon is too hard to resist!

Time Out

So, it's been a while since my last post. Caring for and homeschooling three little ones leaves very little free time. Who knew?

I have a confession to make. I hate taking a shower. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE being clean. I just hate taking time out of my day to bathe. Same is true for drying my hair. Both activities require me to stand still and do NOTHING ELSE for at least ten minutes. If I'm going to be still and do only one thing, I'd like for that thing to be sleep.

I'm a chronic multi-tasker. If I find myself doing only one thing, I feel like I'm doing nothing at all. I don't even watch TV without doing something else at the same time: fold laundry, check email, work out. I have found over the last year of being a Mom of Three that standing still is going backward. Laundry not folded today is a pile of laundry threatening to humanize and take over our home tomorrow. Dishes multiply in the sink like algae in a swamp. Untidied toys unite in cover of darkness, plotting mutiny.

My aversion to showering is especially acute when I don't get to bathe until the boys are in bed, which is more often than not. Once they're in bed, I really want to make the most of every precious child-free moment, doing all the things I can't do when they're awake. I don't want to waste a single minute standing still in the shower.

I understand that I may be alone in this. I'm sure many women see those few moments in the shower as alone time. It's funny what becomes a simple pleasure when you're too busy to remember to brush your teeth. Going to the grocery store alone is a rare luxury. Though I find that, without the incentive to get out as quickly as possible, the grocery bill is slightly higher when I shop alone.

Even sitting here typing this takes me away from a million other things that demand my time. I guess that's why these entries are few and far between. So, I'll step away from the computer and try to decide which of those million things comes first. I think I'll start with hugging my boys.